Why is my girlfriend buying me these weird and useless gifts?
I have a problem with my girlfriend Lisa’s shopping habits. She is always buying me weird and useless gifts! In the last couple of months she has given me: a harpoon, gardening gloves, clogs, dog shampoo, wooden spoons and a t-shirt that says: “I’m not pierced!” I have asked her what I’m supposed to do with these things, but she just tells me that she enjoys shopping for me…
I don’t want to seem ungrateful, but it’s really getting on my nerves! I don’t know how to tell her to stop without hurting her feelings…
Why is my girlfriend buying me these weird and useless gifts?
Women are sneaky creatures! To me it seems that your girlfriend has a plan and she’s following it down to the last letter — or she’s a complete loon… There’s a time in every relationship when the women begins moulding the man in to something she can continue living with. Normally this is done through nagging, guilt trips, threats, and by getting untimely headaches — weeks on end. However, some women will put “tools” (your gifts) in place that she can later use, or rather make you use…
Your girlfriend seems to be exceptionally sneaky, as the “tools” she has acquired so far, don’t seem to make any sense. A harpoon for instance is not something that has a second use as far as I can tell, and I doubt she will suggest that you start fishing for her. Do you have an annoying neighbour, meddling mother or a serious rat problem by any chance?
Only time will tell what kind of plans she has for you. Please do drop me a note when you start finding out. I’m curious… and concerned to a certain extent.
Asking a woman to stop shopping would be like asking President Bush to read a book — it’s never going to happen! The best thing to do is to keep your mouth shut, and wait it out — or get the heck out!
- Dog
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