Do you think she would ever accept me as Rasputin?

I’ve heard that living with fear and resentment are both very unhealthy forms of stress. I suffer from both. I hope you have advice that can lift some of that stress.

My problem is unusual. I’m tired of having the boring name “Rob” and I’ve long dreamed of legally changing my name to Rasputin. I’d have done it already if I had an inch of support from the wife who says she’ll never accept me as a Rasputin.

The wife has even gone as far as to threaten me with a beating if I change my name. (She is bigger than me so I take the threat seriously). I find myself deeply resenting her lack of support. Add in the fear of a beating and I’m a wreck. What should I do?

Do you think she would ever accept me as Rasputin?

It’s funny that you should write about this because I used to be called Rasputin but I changed it to “Risto” which I think fits me better. Did I tell my wife about the name change? Heck, no! You don’t need your wife’s approval to have it legally changed. You also don’t have to explain a thing: when people call our house asking for Risto, my wife thinks it’s my nickname! She and the kids have even taken to calling me by my “nickname” now.

You simply have to give it some time!

However, going from Rob to Rasputin might be a bit of a stretch when it comes to nicknames… Why not go for the equally interesting sounding, and more plausible, “Robsputin”?

Rob is one of the more boring names out there and I think you are right about changing it. You do become your name eventually… Everyone calls our neighbour “Smacktard” and he’s always miserably scurrying in the shadows like a tiny and dumb mouse.

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Do you think she would ever accept me as Rasputin?

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