Why the black woman porn now?
I found your advice column on Google when looking up husbands and computer porn. I understand what you are saying – men will look at women. That’s fine, and it is what it is. As long as it’s not an “obsession”, it’s just men looking at women. I get that.
I’m not a jealous woman. I’m not an immature and ignorant woman… I knew my husband looked at porn on occasion, but it didn’t bother me, as he is a loving man and a great dad. Well, things have changed now…
My husband hired a new secretary a month or so ago. She is a wonderful woman. She is blisteringly intelligent, well spoken, funny and stunningly beautiful. She is also black.
I’m not a racist! The reason why I even brought up color is that my husband’s preference of porn has changed. I know as we use the same computer… Before “her”, it was seemingly random porn — now it’s all black women! All the time! It’s also more porn than it ever was!
Please don’t tell me there is no connection here. I’m not stupid. I’m worried!
Do I talk to him about it? Am I about to be replaced? Is he going to cheat on me?
Why the black woman porn now?
No, you are definitely not stupid…
In general, you shouldn’t need to worry if he is a “loving man and a great dad” — he’s just projecting his “fantasies” in a direction that gets him “off”. As you have figured out already, of course it has to do with his new secretary.
Your quotes: “all black women…” and “more porn than it ever was…” doesn’t sound very healthy or sane… If you are worried — talk to him! You can’t be walking around being worried all the time. Perhaps he just needs a “reality check” to snap out if his “obsession”.
It takes two selfish and short-sighted people to wreck a marriage and a family… A “blisteringly intelligent” secretary (of any color) won’t go there. A “loving man and a great dad” won’t go there either…
You are worried — talk to him!
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