How do I talk to my daughter about sex?
I found my daughter’s diary when picking up in her room. Of course, I looked… I was shocked! Apparently, she is seeing a young man in school and they are sexually active. She thinks she is in “love”… *sigh*.
She is quite descriptive in her diary and she’s not writing about some innocent games… The problem is that I know she’s not mature enough for those kinds of activities. I didn’t even know she knew all those things about sex!
I’m afraid she will get hurt! It’s also not legal for her to have sex and the boy is three years older than she is. What should I do? How do I talk to my daughter about sex? Should I tell her that I looked in the diary?
I’m afraid she will hate me for reading her private thoughts. She trusts me now and I don’t wish this to ruin it.
The young man is visiting his parents out of State and will be back in a week, so I don’t have much time.
Please help!
She trusts you? You ignorant fool! I guess she didn’t trust you well enough to mention the part where she completely lost the ball (and panties), eh? Her job (as a child) is to try to get away with as much as possible… Your job (as a parent) is to gradually let her “get away” with things she CAN deal with on her own. Isn’t that what parenting and growing up is all about? This is not one of those situations…
Do realize that “trust” does not equal “pleasant” or “friendly”. Look it up in the dictionary.
Also, a person screwing your child is not a “young man”, he is a “predator”… Does that clear things up for you a little bit?
As for “how to talk to your daughter about sex?” Well, you obviously missed the boat on that one a little bit… Thus, you now have bigger fish to fry (to a crisp).
Screw privacy! Let her mess up on her own when she’s old enough. Your job is to parent and protect her — jump on it! You didn’t mention how old she is but if someone is preying on your underage daughter — let there be dire consequences… and go to the police.
However, before talking to the authorities, why not make sure you really know what’s going on? Do realize that simply because something was penned down in a “Hello Kitty” diary, it doesn’t necessarily make it so. In a case like this, any sane parent would work on this thing as a “worst case scenario”… Talk to her first and see if she brings it up on her own. If she doesn’t — mention the diary…
Be smart about it. You don’t need to “beat her down” over this. Start with an apology and take it from there… A clever mom would do it when you are both in a good mood and in a location (place) where she can’t just “run” and avoid it all. Take her to an overnight spa or a short trip or something… Basically, go somewhere “neutral”. Have some nice mother-daughter time, make her relax a bit, then bring it up! He is out of the picture for a week. So, you have a week to sort it out.
You need to do it ASAP. She is a kid. She is being used and abused. Deal with it! I would consider it child endangerment if you don’t make this your main priority in life right now.
- Dog
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